Saturday, April 30, 2011

The garage

I put this giant picture in the garage by the recycling... I had intended to put it up in my apartment, but it turned out to be a little too pink.  Imagine it taking over an entire room in a very obnoxious 'no escaping' kind of way.  So, I got rid of it.  ...and hours later found it placed against the back wall of my building's dreary parking garage looking quite amazingly charming.  :)

~~~
(a garage vignette.)

I was getting out of my car and was met by a neighbor getting out of his car. 

"Well, good evening..." he said. 

"Hi" I replied. 

He asked how I was doing, and then started telling me that he was thinking that he should charge my parents for his mirror because he wouldn't have hit the pillar if he hadn't been looking at me.

o_O ... I must've been giving him a blank stare, so he elaborated. 

"Remember that day, you were pulling out and I was pulling in [to the garage] and I hit that pillar shattering my side mirror?  I was thinking I should charge your parents for my mirror because I wouldn't have hit the pillar if I hadn't been staring at you."  He followed this with a little chuckle. 

I didn't know how to respond so, again, I probably looked kind of blank. 

I think he actually gave me another iteration as I was searching my memory for this incident.  It did seem familiar... but then, I immediately got caught up in the fact that my parents aren't biological, so they have nothing to do with how I look and shouldn't be charged for this... and then, I thought, maybe it had something to do with what I was wearing at the time (yes, my mind does this)...which started me imaging all of my outfits, and which one might've been capable of making someone run into a pillar...  it must've been a red dress, which made me feel like I did remember this happening and the thought that passed through my mind at the time was, "Dude - that SUCKS... "  ha!

I told him I did think I remembered it. 

There was an awkward silence.

How the hell are you supposed to respond to passive aggressive flirting... ?! 

4 comments:

des said...

Passive aggressive flirting..perfectly coined. Stay away from those!

kristen said...

haha, thanks des. :)

me said...

Tell him that you don't shit where you live and let him puzzle that one out.

kristen said...

or, maybe i could tell him, "what you should do is charge your parents for not doing a good job of teaching you how to drive a car or talk to women. :|" ;)